Hammertime: March is lost in the snow

Ponoka News’ Hammertime looks at spring, or what Alberta springs can be like.

Mike Rainone


There is absolutely no doubt that this past March 2018 came in like a wild white Lion and then roared out exactly the same way.

But fear not, April Fool’s jokes or not, it really was minus 26 degrees C on that bright fun day morning, we all now really do deserve to slip and splash our way into some sort of spring, and then look forward to a long and hot summer? I was really quite optimistic last week when in the middle of another snow storm I spied two majestic geese winging their way in search of their prairie playground, as well as several pesky magpies and crows picking away at the ice and snow to find some tasty tidbits, but there were no motorcycles out and about yet.

Hopefully everyone had a wonderful Easter weekend together with family and friends and did not overdose on turkey and chocolate. Unfortunately that annual jolly outdoor Easter egg hunt for the younger children was likely ‘snowed out,’ unless you were hiding coloured eggs or treats with homing devices. There are always lots of neat places to hide them around the house, while here at our condo building each and every Easter weekend the wise and kindly ‘lady bunnies’ always place lots of chocolate eggs on each floor for the visiting grand-children to search for with great gusto and there are always a few left over for us older ‘chocoholics’ to snitch.

Here’s a little tip for those who got lots of chocolate eggs this Easter. Break them all up before you eat them…that way all the calories will fall out.

Even though April is usually the ‘mushiest’ month of them all, it can also be a refreshing time full of longer sunshine spells between a few spring showers, and eventually that amazing transformation from drifts to dirt along with the long anticipated arrival of everything green. Many will soon wander out in their big boots and longingly look at the garden spots, the back yard, the golf courses, the tennis courts, the ball diamonds, the soccer fields, the parks, the walking trails, and all the other outside playgrounds with great anticipation of soon getting right into the annual ‘spring fling’ for all ages. This is also the perfect month to check out all the flashy new spring fashions and the ultimate new hot weather toys for boys and girls from infancy to daring adults, as well as to start planning summer holidays and booking your favourite campground spot.

As soon as the weather warms up and the ground dries up there will be a feel good frenzy to organize your first neighbourhood garage sales, while registration dates for the keen sports of softball, baseball, soccer, football, swimming and golf lessons, and all sorts of other spring and summer activities for tots to seniors will be announced and hosted. Whatever the case, let’s swing into spring and choose our leisure activities at our speed with family and lots of old and new friends.

Now let’s have a little fun

• When I was young I was a real rebel…smoked candy cigarettes and took Tic Tacs. My goal, like many of you in 2018 was to lose 10 pounds, and now I only have 15 to go.

• Can’t find your children? Just try turning off the Wi-Fi and they will appear immediately.

• Mother to fussy son: 20 years from now you’ll be telling some girl what a great cook my mother was…so quit complaining and eat your dinner.

• Everyone must always remember that they are never too important to be nice to people. Some of our biggest super heroes wear scrubs…so let’s give a big thank you to all of our nurses.

• A great way to slow down speeders: Sit in your car while you are parked and having lunch, put on a pair of sunglasses, and then point your hair dryer out the window and watch them slow down real quick.

• Wackiest questions and facts of the week: Do twins ever realize that one of them was unplanned? Many animals probably need glasses, but nobody knows it.

Plan for the first weeks in April: stock up on lots of windshield washer fluid, not a good time for flip-flops, drive carefully, watch for pot-holes, don’t splash your neighbours, and then go ahead and have a great week, all of you.

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