MIKE RAINONE/Hammertime
The usually chilly months of March and April got rather wild and woolly this time around as the gloves would really come off along the turbulent 2011 federal election trail.
Then on May 2, 61 per cent of our nation’s disgruntled taxpayers used their right to vote, and made an overwhelming decision that we will now have to live with for at least four more years. During that quickie campaigning fracas, the leaders of our federal political parties put on many miles in a desperate coast-to-coast-coast dash to promote their platforms and promises, while slinging a lot of mud at each other along the way.
When it was all over and the television and Twitter results began to flow, it didn’t take long for many millions of us Monday night couch potatoes to realize that the winds of change were really blowing across the hustings. As quick as you could say ‘wipe-out,’ it was quite obvious that the Bloc Quebecois was crumbling and the once powerful Liberal party opposition was slipping out of the race. Meanwhile, as fast as the polls were closing from east to west, a powerful blue wave of Conservative blue was rolling across the nation, while an upstart orange clad team of New Democrats were gaining a spirited new momentum of popularity. This exciting but surprising revival has earned them a vital role as what will no doubt be a feisty Official Opposition.
Yes, Prime Minister Stephen Harper and his zealous Conservative party finally have their majority government, so now is the time to lead the way and get back to the vital business and economic future of our proud nation, with no holds barred, and absolutely no excuses. Whatever promises were made along the way, they will now all have to be brought to the table, with emphasis on such priorities as health and education, but making sure that the needs of each and every Canadian citizen, young or old, rich or poor is always being considered. There is absolutely no doubt that new the newfound enthusiasm and representation from Jack Layton’s NDP side of the house will be heard each and every day, along with those who will be desperately trying to rebuild their lost popularity.
For the next few years all of us need to get to know the members of Parliament that we have elected, never being afraid to contact them at their riding offices, by phone, by email, or in person. In case you didn’t know the free information line for your Government of Canada is (1-800-622-6232), (1-800-926-9105) for the deaf, and their website is: Canada.gc.ca.
To close off this subject I just have to pass on this ‘politically correct’ joke.
Young Chuck moved to Saskatchewan and bought a donkey from a farmer for $100. The farmer had agreed to deliver the donkey the next day. As promised he drove up early next morning and explained, ‘Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the donkey died.’ Chuck replied, ‘Well then, just give me my money back.’
But the farmer explained that he had already spent it. Chuck then said, ‘OK, just bring me the dead donkey, which the farmer did and asked, ‘What ya gonna do with him?’
‘I’m going to raffle him off,’ young Chuck replied with a smile.
The farmer insisted that he could not raffle of a dead donkey, but Chuck declared that he could, because he just wouldn’t tell anyone that it was dead.
A month later the farmer met up with Chuck and immediately inquired, ‘What happened with that donkey?’
Chuck proudly replied, ‘I raffled him off, just like I said I would, sold 500 tickets at $2 a piece and made a tidy profit of $898.’
‘Didn’t anyone complain?’ the farmer asked.
Chuck said, ‘Just the guy who won, so I gave him his two dollars back.’
Chuck grew up and now works for the government.
A Mother’s dictionary
Dumbwaiter: one who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
Drooling: How teething babies wash their chins.
Hearsay: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
Grandparents: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they are not quite sure if you are raising them right.
Bottle feeding: An opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 a.m. also.
Whoops: an exclamation that translates roughly into ‘get a sponge.’
Top bunk: where you should not put a child who is wearing Superman jammies.
Verbal: Able to whine in words.
Have a great week, all of you!