Let’s all try to forget frigid February

HAMMERTIME

It may very well be the understatement of the century, but with the exception of the gas company, the snow removal contractors, the ice fisherman, and the snowmen, I think that most of us have had just about enough of winter.

Of course, we are those hardy souls and survivors from Canada, but after shovelling through record snowfalls, shivering in record temperatures, and slip sliding away since December, enough is enough, OK?

The only ‘hot’ day in February was Valentine’s Day, and that is because we all turned up the heat, but despite the fact that they had to cancel some of the Polar Bear dips on Family Day, spirits stayed high and they moved most of the festivities inside or close to the hot chocolate. During this ongoing and boring cold snap, many of us were forced to stay inside and watch re-runs, soaps, or curling on TV but it was a great time to catch up on hobbies, housework, and blend in with the rest of the family. We must all admire those hardy souls who have to go out each and every day to face the elements, and then there are those enthusiasts who happily bundle up for a vigorous session of jogging, skating, skiing, or whatever to create rosy cheeks and healthy bodies.

On the bright side, the moisture will be great, even though it may take until June for ice to melt, and how great will it be to toss off all those extra layers of clothes. Now we are into the month of March, which can produce any sort of weather, although the days are getting longer, but we must try to be optimistic and believe that spring should be somewhere just around the corner. No, I am not complaining at all, just getting a little older and softer, but then again we could be getting the cyclones, earthquakes, and all those other wicked weather disruptions and disasters that are being felt around the world.

Whatever the case, the countdown is on, so let’s all dig out and get ready to unthaw just in time for the annual spring fling.

The simple but brilliant truths about life

Some of you may have heard about Will Rogers (1879-1935), an American cowboy turned humorist, social critic, author, lecturer, and movie star? Rogers was widely known for his brilliant homespun humour and down-to earth philosophy, and here are just a few examples that we can all chuckle about.

• Never slap a man who is chewing tobacco.

• Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

• There are two theories to arguing with a woman and neither works.

• Never miss a good chance to shut up.

• Always drink upstream from the herd.

• If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

• The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.

• There are three kinds of men: The ones who learn by reading, the few who learn by observation, and the rest of them who have to pee on an electric fence to find out for themselves.

• Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

• If you are always riding ahead of the herd, take a good look back every now and then to make sure that it’s still there.

• Letting the cat out of the bag is a whole lot harder than putting it back in.

• After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept this up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you’re full of bull, keep your mouth shut!

Theories about growing old

• Eventually we will all reach a point when we stop lying about our age and start bragging about it.

• The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

• Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know ‘why’ I look this way. I’ve travelled a long way, some of the roads weren’t paved, and there were lots of wrong turns.

• When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, think about Algebra and cod liver oil!

• Some of us will never know how we ever got over the hill without getting to the top.

• One must quite often wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.

• Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable

• Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks it was called witchcraft. Today it’s called golf.

Always remember that if you don’t learn to laugh at trouble, you won’t have anything to laugh at when you are old.

Always try to make sure that every day, no matter what, is precious, and then have a great week, all of you!