Let’s try to skip those January blues, blahs

HAMMERTIME</b

Never mind that those dreaded green income tax forms are already arriving in the mail or that our credit cards were maxed in December — let’s all try to head into January 2011 with high expectations of what the future will bring for all of us.

After the gala Christmas celebration this usually cold month of January can quite often be a bit of a downer, but if we aim to take a positive approach, set a sensible budget, and somehow get a chuckle out of every day, we will survive!

They claim that the national economy will continue to slowly improve this year, with our Alberta leading the way, while striving to live within our means and hoping the government takes the same approach. On a personal note we likely are already working on some new resolutions and promises for 2011, but it is important to include everyone else in those challenges, so that we can spur each other on, then celebrate our successes together.

My goals for the new year include staying active and skinny, becoming a better domestic assistant, keeping up to our growing family, chasing good stories, and visiting old friends, as long as I can still remember their names and where they live.

As you all strive to reach your goals, I wish you all the best and success in 2011, but please, take some precious time along the way to stop and smell the roses, have some fun, and don’t be afraid to share the highs and the lows with others.

Now let’s have a little fun!

• On many occasions all of us have had to come up with a quick answer or opinion on some real tough questions and subjects from people of all ages. Here is what I consider to be an absolutely marvellous answer:

A mechanic was removing the cylinder heads from the motor of a car when he spotted a famous heart surgeon, who was standing off to the side in his shop waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his fancy car. The mechanic shouted across the garage, “Hello doctor, could you please come over here for a minute?” The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic, who straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag, and asked a rather argumentative question. “So doctor, look at this. I also open hearts, take valves out, grind ’em, put in new parts, and when I finish this will work as well as a new one. So how come you get the big money, when you and me is doing basically the same work?”

The doctor slowly leaned over and whispered to the mechanic, “Try to do it when the engine is still running.”

The wife versus the husband saga

• A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and now neither wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard full of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, ‘Relative of yours?’ ‘Yep’, the wife replied. ‘In-laws!’

• A man and his wife were having a casual argument about who should brew the coffee each morning. The wife claimed, ‘You should do it because you get up first, and then we don’t have to sit and wait as long to get our first cup of coffee.’ The husband quickly came back with, ‘You are in charge of cooking around here, and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.’

Always trying to stay one step ahead in thought patterns and witty answers, the wife smiled and replied, ‘No dear, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should prepare the coffee.’ Quite disgruntled the hubby utters, “I can’t believe that, you will have to show me!’ Calmly his good wife fetched the Bible, opened the New Testament, and showed him at the top of several pages that it indeed says….‘HEBREWS.’

• Under the subject of ‘women’s revenge’ a lady fumbled through her purse to get the money to pay for her purchases at the clothing store when the remote control for a television set suddenly dropped out on the counter.

‘So do you always carry your TV remote control in your purse?’ the clerk asked. ‘No,’ she replied, ‘but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured that this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally and get even!’

I hope that I haven’t given anyone any ideas, because if we ever did have to miss ‘the game’ to go shopping it would likely be the end of the world. Most spouses have found that it is much easier to negotiate than to try and win.

Have a great week, all of you!